Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

Wednesday, March 7, 2012

Hello again!  I want to say that I am sorry that it has been a while since I posted, especially to those of you that have called or emailed me saying are you okay, it's been a while.  I have had quite a busy few weeks and have been dealing with several particular problems of the heart during this season of Lent.  I have not been on Facebook either as that is what I gave up for Lent as it truly was getting in my way spending time with God on certain days.  You know so often we want to call a friend, or make a post, or confide in our spouse with our problems.  But during the last several weeks, my focus have been to take it straight to the top.  FIRST!!  Here I want to say especially with those things that are the real heart strings.  However, the truth is, it should be that way with all things.  Then we have to take the time to listen for God to answer.  Something that takes hard work and not very many people are willing to do.  I am learning much. 

For those of you that are aware of my New Year's resolution to read the entire Bible by the girls birthday, (or due date as it looks like might be the case), I am proud to report that I am well underway.  Almost three fourths of the way there.  (And I still have until either November 26th or April 27th, whichever fits God's plan.)  I will say that there are books that I have read and merely become familiar with, and then there are those that I have dug into looking for something more, something deeper, something of God.  As always He has delivered.  By the time I am finished I will at least be familiar with the entire Bible, making finding those sweet spots a bit easier.  Oh how precious those sweet spots are to my heart.

I had the chance to visit yesterday with a dear friend of mine that I can not even begin to thank enough for all that she has been and done for me.  She simply let me cry on her shoulder over a tender moment without any questions.  Now that's a friend.  Somethings are just private matters and although we can share certain aspects, not all of it can be disclosed.  Thank you Dawn for just being there!  Daily.

As I sit here and write, I think of something that I encountered yesterday.  Again the specifics are not important, God knows what they are, but the implications could be life changing.  Yesterday as I had my quiet time and began to pray, I knew there was a specific situation that I needed to pray about that involved someone that is very dear to me.  As I prayed I just couldn't get it together.  I was finding it very difficult to pray for this person.  So I prayed God help me understand why.  And you know that funny feeling you get when you feel convicted.  Well, there it was loud and clear.  It is really hard to pray for someone when you feel like they have hurt you, or your feelings, or they just don't understand.  Really hard.  But no one knows that better that Christ.  Because He did it.  Out loud!  As He hung on the cross, His words were loud and clear:

Jesus said, “Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they are doing.” And they divided up his clothes by casting lots.  Luke 23:24
God helped me to see two things through situation.  Although praying for those that have hurt us is hard, it is our responsibility and a privilege.  And second, sometimes we need to pray it out loud!  Real loud!  So after several attempts at it, I got it right.  Just me and God and the raw bitter truth of my heart.  Just like He wants it.



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